Four Family Advent Ideas

Wondering how you can celebrate Advent in your home? Here are four ideas for your family to use this Advent.

Use an Advent Calendar

A custom, non-chocolate Advent calendar

Advent is a season of waiting in joyful, expectant hope.  An Advent calendar helps pass on this idea by creating a time of day everyone looks forward to because something that's hidden becomes seen.  Many calendars in department stores feature chocolate treats (and everyone looks forward to chocolate treats).  There are even wacky, specialized Advent calendars you can buy, like the Lego calendar, for those with a particular interest.

Another approach is to create your own calendar as a family.  Buy a reusable Advent calendar online or create one yourself using 24 small containers (one for each day from December 2 to Christmas).  Inside the containers, write and place one small activity for your family to do together

Simple Creche

Set Up a Creche
At the manger scene, you can gather each night for prayer. An old, but good, custom is to invite your children to place one piece of straw in the cradle for good deeds they or the family did that day. The more good deeds, the softer the cradle becomes for Jesus. My family has a tradition of placing baby Jesus in the cradle when we come back from Christmas Mass on Christmas Eve.  Do that, or create your own tradition.

Pray with an Advent Wreath

Advent wreath

Light candles corresponding to the candles lit at Mass on Sundays and pray around the wreath each Sunday (here's a guide for praying with the Advent wreath on Sundays) and/or each day during your normal family prayer time.  After you assemble your Advent wreath, say a few words of blessing as a family.  Use the family Advent wreath blessing from Loyola Press or this blessing from our own US Conference of Catholic Bishops.

Make a Jesse Tree

Jesse tree in progress

What is a Jesse tree?  The Diocese of Eerie explains:

In the month before Christmas, the church anticipates the coming of Jesus through readings that span from the Old Testament creation story through Jesus’ birth. Jesse, for whom the tree is named, is the first person in the genealogy of Jesus. At the top of this family tree are Mary and Jesus. Depicted in church windows and artwork for hundreds of years, this visual tree of life may even have been a forerunner of today’s Christmas tree.

Simply put, the Jesse tree is sort of like an Advent calendar, except biblical.  It's a way to pray through the stories from the Old Testament to prepare our hearts and minds for the coming of Jesus.
To create a Jesse tree, you can follow the instructions on the Diocese of Eerie webpage, or from a blog called Catholic Style.  Those links also have instructions for praying with the Jesse tree.

image credits: Patrick Q on flickr; Jose M. Vazquez; usedcarspecialist on flickr; Silly Eagle Books on flickr

8 Ways to Celebrate Sacred Time as a Family

Family fun

Meaningful moments are lurking around every corner!  Each day presents us with a new opportunity to encounter God as a family.  An article on Loyola Press' website lists eight different ways to harness ordinary daily and yearly moments to bring us closer to God and one another.  Some you can try today, some may require some waiting.

Pay close attention to number five, "make more of your time in the car together."  This summer, as we travel from place to place for camps, hangouts and roadtrips, try to harness that time together in the car.  Besides the recommendation they give, you can try these four other ways of having car conversations.

Check out the rest of the article for other suggestions.

How do you mark sacred moments as a family?  What special things do you do together?

Image Credit: Pink Sherbet Photography on Flickr

Praying With Children At Night: the Examen

I see the moon, and the moon sees me...

The day is drawing to a close.  It's time to get ready for bed and prepare for tomorrow.  Practically speaking, this means brushing teeth, putting on PJs, and packing the backpack for another big, big day.  But what about our day with God?  How do we wind down the day with God and prepare for tomorrow -- and help our children to do this too?

Enter Ignatian spirituality, a branch of Catholic spirituality that prays through the events of the day.  I wrote a blog post on praying the Examen as an adult in the winter, but didn't mention a way to pray this way with children.  Well, now you can.

With the help of this blog post on praying with 12-year olds, I developed a worksheet to help children and adults to pray.  Below is a five-step prayer:

1. Start with a period of relaxation.  Throughout the day events and choices can overwhelm and pull at us.  Not even children are immune from tension.  This period of calmness allows us to ask the Holy Spirit to inspire us in our prayer.
2. With the strength of the Spirit, we work our way through the day, from beginning to the present moment, and list at least three things that we're thankful for.  Big or small; meaningful or seemingly irrelevant; whatever you're thankful for write them down.
3. Again, working back through the day, we think about what happened.  What sort of feelings or emotions came to us today?  When did these occur?
4. From this list, we focus on one item and ask God to teach us.  Spend a few moments in conversation with God, then complete the sentence "Maybe the message is/Maybe God is trying to tell me..."
5. Finally, we ask God to help us learn from our day today and live a better tomorrow.  Complete the prayer, "God, please help me to..."

The worksheet is embedded below.  The top half of the contains the guidance for praying the examen while the bottom half can be filled out as you pray.  A PDF version of this form can be downloaded by clicking here and pressing Ctrl + S.


May God be with you and your family as you pray your nightly prayers!

Photo Credit: Patricia Kashtock on flickr

Holy Week Basket

Fill your basket

With Holy Week around the corner, here's an idea for your family that will help make Holy Week a special week: Holy Week baskets!  Bust out the fake green grass a little early and scrounge up your Spring-colored plastic Easter eggs: we're repurposing them in a non-candy way.

Put the green plasticy grass in the basket, and place the basket in a prominent place in your house.  Inside the eggs, place slips of paper with different actions or ideas for keeping Holy Week.  For ideas, check out the description of a classroom version of this activity.  Here are some that are St. Mark specific:

• Attend the Palm Sunday parish penance service (at 7:00PM on Palm Sunday)
• Donate a household item for those who cannot afford it (see bulletin for details)
• Attend a Holy Week service at St. Mark

What other ideas could you include in your Holy Week basket?

Image credit: tracitodd on flickr

2 Family Lenten Events at St. Mark

How is your family’s Lent this year? Okay? Good? Not so good?

There are two opportunities (both at St. Mark) in the next week for your family: (1) (Youth Mass +) Parish Lenten Mission and (2) Pizza + Children’s Stations of the Cross.

(Youth Mass +) Parish Lenten Mission
On Sunday evening, we have our monthly youth Mass at 6PM followed by a family dinner at 7PM in the Activities Center. After dinner, children (grades preschool through 8th) are invited to join in a Lenten Workshop. Parents are encouraged to attend the Parish Mission at 7:30PM being held in the church at the same time (starting at 7:30PM). (We would ask one parent to remain in the activity center if your children are in 2nd grade or below.) The title of the Mission is Lent: Our Journey into the Mystery of God.

On Monday and Tuesday Evenings, you’re invited to the other two nights of the Mission, also beginning at 7:30PM. Check out our awesome flyer (PDF) for more info.

Pizza + Children’s Stations of the Cross
Join us next Friday, March 9 for Pizza + Children’s Stations of the Cross. Pizza will be served at 7PM in the Activities Center and Stations will begin at 7:30PM in the Church. This particular Stations of the Cross caters to children in the primary grades, but is suitable for all ages. Donations will be accepted to help offset the cost of the pizza.

Please RSVP to Isaac by noon on Thursday, March 8 so we can order enough pizza.

Car Conversation: On Your Way to Mass

Kids in the car!

It can be a struggle to get in the car, but once you're there you have a great opportunity to engage your children in preparing for Mass.  Here are a few ideas:

• If possible, you can have someone in your car read through the Gospel.  Talk about the Gospel for the few minutes you have.  Your kids will be more focused during the Gospel after having talked it through.
• Only one driving?  When we're at Mass, we have a chance to bring in all that happened during the week and pray through the events and circumstances of our lives.  Have everyone answer and share one of each the following:
• What are you thankful for this week?
• What do you need need forgiveness for this week?
• What sacrifices have you made this week?
• What do you need to pray for for this upcoming week?
• Need some quiet time?  Ask everyone to spend a few moments conversing with God (AKA praying).  Sometimes when we're running close to the start of Mass, this quiet time is important to help us transition  into Mass.

What sorts of conversations do you have in the car with your children before Mass?  Is it pure chaos?  Leave a comment below and share.

Image Credit: Thomas Widmann on flickr

Back to Counting Time

Time keeps on slippin'....into the future

With the celebration of Jesus' Baptism on Monday, the Church closed out her Christmas season with a bang (really, with a trickle of water).  Gone from St. Mark are the Christmas decorations.  No more creche, no more star behind the altar, no more wreaths, and no more "Merry Christmas."  Our liturgical celebrate of Christmas is over until December 2012, so now what?

Not Plain...
Now we return to what is called "ordinary time."  That phrase sounds very plain and, well, ordinary.  Our liturgical time is "ordinary" right now because we're neither feasting (Christmas and Easter) nor fasting (Lent); we're neither celebrating (solemnities and feast days) nor preparing (Advent).  Our time is "ordinary" because the Church counts all the days between these special moments and numbers them, places them in a certain order with readings that thematic but not necessarily tied down to a certain celebration or moment.  And just like life, we spend most of the liturgical year neither feasting nor fasting; neither celebrating nor preparing.

...But Still Kept
So what can we do to make ordinary time special?  How can we mark this ordered time?  Our Sunday Visitor gives us six ways to living in ordinary time.  You could try one of those six, or you can come up with your own way to focus your spiritual energy during this liturgical season.

What's your favorite way to mark ordinary time?  Or have you never thought about it?  How can your family grow in faith from here until Lent begins on February 22?


Image: Leo Reynolds (flickr)

A New Years, a New Opportunity

My sister once told me that she has four major reflective moments each year to assess how she is as a human being: the beginning of Lent, her birthday, the beginning of Advent, and New Years.  Tomorrow will be New Year's Eve.  How are you and your family?

Growing up, my parents encouraged us kids to participate in "giving things up" during Lent, but not before thinking about what we did with our time.  This taught me that reflection is necessary before action (or resolution).  As I grew older, this practice transitioned into making New Year's resolutions, something I continue to this day.  Thanks Mom and Dad!

Help your children cultivate that sense of self-reflection.  Encourage them to think about how they are and who they would like to be; how they spend their time and how they would like to grow.  Here are some practical tips to help you do that.

Be specific
"I will be awesome" is a great resolution...if you want to fail.  Instead, think of specific areas in your life and encourage your children to do the same.  What do you do (or don't do) that you want to change (or start to do)?  Try something challenging but doable.

Use this format

• I will _________.  I plan to do this by __________.
  
      OR
• I will not __________.  Instead, I will _________.

Example A (for adults): I will spend more time with my family.  I plan to do this by silencing my phone during dinner.
Example B (for children): I will not watch 2 hours of TV a day.  Instead, I will play my musical instrument, read, and play with my Legos.

Start with yourself
You can't pass on what yourself don't already practice.  Before encouraging reflection in your children, take sometime when you 're alone (even if it's in the restroom) and be with yourself and with God.  Have you had something peculating for months that you think would be a good resolution?  Is there a glaring area of need for balance in your life?  Or maybe this will be the year when you finally do XYZ.  If you don't try, it won't happen.  Try something challenging, but doable.

Encourage your children
Guide your children through a similar process as mentioned above.  Help them think about their own lives, how they treat their family and friends, how the spend their time, how much screen time they have, etc.  As with yourself, encourage them to try something challenging but doable.

Share your resolution
Maybe your resolution will be to be more forthcoming in your relationships: "I will share my resolution with my family.  I plan to do this by printing the resolution out and giving it to my family so they can hold me accountable."  Sounds like a great plan.

But seriously, if you keep your resolution to yourself, it'll be tough to keep.  As the old saying goes, "When shared, joys are multiplied and burdens are divided."

...And may you and your family have a Happy New Year!  See you in 2012!

Image: Salvatore Vuono / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Image Credit: jeff_golden
Image Credit: Carlos Maya

Christmas Carol at Family Movie Night - Friday December 16

On Friday, December 16 you and your family are invited to view A Christmas Carol.  The film is part of the family movie night series and will start at 7PM.  Based on Charles Dicken's classic, this version is the 1984 iteration starting George C. Scott (snippet below).



You're invited to bring cookies to share and there will be some complimentary refreshments.

Website Wednesday: CatholicMom.com

This is how it looks using Google Chrome

Reviving a Wednesday theme, let's take a look at a great Catholic website for all parents that will help you include faith in your life.  CatholicMom.com is for more than just moms.  Click around the menu long enough and you'll soon realize there's something for everyone: Mom, Dad, teachers, catechists, Catholic and non-Catholic alike.

One of the strengths of the website is that it's updated with regularity.  If there's something going on in the Catholic Church, odds are there's an article, activity, or idea to incorporate it into your family.  You can see from the screen shot that there's a section on Advent.  And for the Immaculate Conception, they have a short article explaining history and some of our beliefs about the day.

Digging a little deeper, here are a few of the sections I'd like to highlight that are useful.

Sunday Gospel Activities
Encourage your children to learn about the Good News at home by utilizing one of the activities present in CatholicMom's incredible collection.  Organized by month and then by Sunday, the Sunday Gospel Activities provide something for many ages.  Your child is in the coloring phase?  There's a weekly coloring page (PDF). Kids love word searches?  They've got the word search (PDF) market covered.  Simple crossword?  You bet (PDF).  There are even what they call "mass worksheets" for children ages 7-10 (PDF) and 11-14 (PDF) to help them get more from that weekend's liturgy.  I wouldn't recommend coming to mass to fill these out, but still these can be great for getting ready for mass or processing afterward.

Movie Reviews
Multimedia play a big role in the life of children in the 21st century.  But as with anything we're exposed to, we need to be aware of what that media does to us and to our children.  CatholicMom's provides a tiny section on movie reviews that will review newly released DVDs as well as films still in the theaters.  Past reviews include the re-release of Dumbo, Super 8, and The Help.  While not updated with every movie that comes out, movie reviews do come in from time to time and appear on the front page of the main website.

(If you're very interested in other good film review sites, Catholic News Services reviews films as does a Christian website called Decent Films.)

Blog
Probably the greatest strong of the website is the blog that's updated every day.  It also happens to be the front page of the website.  A variety of articles will educate and entertain you, providing you helpful articles for parents and some opportunities to grow in your own faith.  Since that's along the same lines with what I hope to provide here on the blog, you should definitely check them out!

A hub for all things Catholic, CatholicMom is a solid resource for you and your family.

If you have a website you recommend, leave a comment or send Isaac an email:

Five Family Advent Ideas

Yesterday we learned about Advent in two minutes.  So how do we practice preparation in our family?  Here are five ways your family can prepare for Christmas this Advent.

Decorate

My wife and I started a tradition last year of decorating our house on the third Sunday of Advent.  Why the third Sunday?  Because it's Gaudete Sunday!  It's a Sunday of Joy and we mark that time as a Church by using rose (pink) colored vestments at mass and light the rose (pink) colored candle.  Decorate with various greens, religious icons or drawings or pictures, lights, a creche (see below) and of course all the usual Christmas decorations.

Use an Advent Calendar

There are many Advent calendars to choose from online.  Here's one for a family (PDF) and one for children (PDF).  For you parents, here's one you can do online, which I do every year.  It includes a short quote or video clip and an action to do each day. On the First Sunday of Advent, it featured an excellent video clip from Lord of the Rings -- so you know it must be good.

Or, make your own calendar.  On the days from today to Christmas, write a different action you or your family can do in preparation for the coming of Christ. For example, write a Christmas card to a relatives, clean the house for guests, or make Christmas presents instead of buying them.

Make a Creche
At the manger scene, you can gather each night for prayer. Tell your kids to place one piece of straw in the cradle for good deeds they or their family did that day. The more good deeds, the softer the cradle becomes for Jesus. My family has a tradition of placing baby Jesus in the cradle when we come back from Christmas Mass on Christmas Eve.  Use that or create your own tradition.

Use an Advent Wreath
Light candles corresponding to the candles lit at Mass on Sundays and pray around the wreath every day.  Need your wreath blessed?  Try this family Advent wreath blessing from Loyola Press or this blessing from our own US Conference of Catholic Bishops.

Donate
Gather some clothes, toys, and other items to donate to a local charity. Try donating a favorite toy or favorite article of clothing. It may be difficult, but giving up our favorite items can foster a deeper love for others and remind us that others deserve the best we have to offer.

How does your family prepare for Advent?  What's your favorite family tradition?  What do you hope your children pass on to their children?  Share your ideas, leave a comment.

Link: Taking Young Children to Mass

Children and mass

"How do we bring our young children to mass?"  This question is on the minds and lips of many first time and veteran parents who risk stares if their young children make even a peep at mass.

Much ink has been spilled by way of pamphlets and brochures to help parents raise their kids in the faith.  A new article on ForYourMarriage.org distills many suggestions and presents them through the eyes of a couple with two young children.  Among the suggestions I found most interesting:

We physically hold our children in our arms during Mass. In fact, we adopted the position that our children’s feet do not touch the ground during Mass until they are three years old. This helps in many ways. The children get a get a better view; as they grow and mature we can talk them through the stories and the actions; and we have a bit more control over their behavior. If an infant or toddler gets squirmy, often switching who is holding them is enough to calm them down. Otherwise we might play a quiet game of “point to the…candles, priest, altar, cross, etc.”

Read the rest of the article for more tips on bringing children to mass or leave a comment to share your own.

Image Credit: Mandy_Jansen

All Souls' Day: We Pray for and Remember the Dead

We pray for the dead

Prayers
All Souls' Day reminds us that part of the life of the Christian Catholic is to pray for the dead.  We have a mystical link to them through the Body of Christ and we believe that our prayers, somehow, help those in purgatory be with God in heaven.  (More information on purgatory and praying for the dead found here).

At St. Mark, we have a special Mass today at 7:30PM for all who have passed away, especially those who have died within the past year.  Throughout the month of November, our Book of the Dead will be available in the Narthex for you to inscribe the names of your deceased relatives and friends.  We will remember all these individuals during the masses this month.

Remembering
Aside from prayer, take sometime today to talk with your family about a love one who has passed on.  Growing up, I always loved hearing stories of relatives who passed before my birth, to see how the faces and voices of those sharing memories would brighten.  When we share these memories with each other, especially with children, we pass on our family tradition and heritage, and the childhood of grandparents or uncles seems more real.  Stories of how great grandma immigrated here not knowing the language inspire us to keep going even in the most difficult moments.

Give your children that gift today of coming to know someone you loved.  They'll thank you later.

Image: africa / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

No Family is Perfect

Halloween is a week away.  In Vienna, the annual Halloween parade is right around the corner.  You may feel lots of pressures to live up to how another family celebrates Halloween.  Keep this in mind.

"A family is holy not because it is perfect, but because God's grace is at work in it, helping it to set out anew everyday in the way of love." -- Follow the way of Love

 Simple words from the Bishop Conference echo those of Jesus: "Love one another."

Car Conversation: Reminds You of Jesus

a statue of Jesus

An easy car conversation to hold with your children this week: Who have you seen or encountered this week that has reminded you of Jesus?  In what ways?


Makes sure before you ask the question you have an answer from your own life.  Your kids will probably ask you for an example right away.  The best examples will be someone that they know too, someone in their life.

Don't be intimidated or afraid -- you can do this!

Image: zole4 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Car Conversation: Gives You Hope

Look familiar?

Northern Virginia has awful traffic.  In any given week, you might spend a few hours in traffic with your children driving to school, after school activities, and the grocery store.  Instead of jamming to the Top 40s or everyone popping in their headphones, shake things up with a car conversation.  "Car Conversations" suggests topics that you and your children can talk in the car while you're waiting for your red light on 123.